Hooked on Polkas: The Legacy of Weird Al

Fade in on a lonely kid listening to another boy singing “Eat It.” Pan to a middle schooler obsessively hunting for new cassettes. Crossfade to a grown man standing in a bookstore, crying. Being a super fan of anything boils down to a few memorable moments that come to define at least a small part of who you are.

Losing It: The Weight Loss Journey of a Self-Proclaimed Fat Guy

I used to be a skinny mother@#$%er, but I was never in shape. You could see my rib cage when I’d inhale, and on the days when we ran the mile in high school, you could see it a lot as I’d lay on the ground and gasp for air praying for a quick and merciful end to my misery. I just had one of those metabolisms where I could eat anyone under the table at any all-you-can-eat joint, and while I never played a team sport, I got a lot of training. One of my fondest memories as a kid was spending time at Panda, a Chinese buffet that was a part of a hotel in Jacksonville Beach not far from our church. We went every Sunday, but we weren’t zealots. On non-holy days, we’d hit up other smorgasbords.